god, too, is bisexual
one sweltering saturday,
when the verdant sky still had its translucent light
god woke, aroused, groggy from creation
and craving the luscious feel of masculine touches
he created, in his own image, for his sexual orgies
a man, blessed with the handsome features of supreme beings
and the gift of intelligence
and god, seeing that he was good, fell in love
and so began the routine of evening intercourse
between man and god—a supernatural consummation
of two masculine bodies, sweaty from rigorous passion.
like man, devoid of lengthy attention span
god, bored by the sensual satisfaction from male ego
needed another being—maybe a new sex object
and seeing that he wielded the powers of creation
again, for his sexual explorations, he created another being-
from the crevices of existing protocols-
known for its succulent boobs and fleshy butts
and the story of creation
became a genesis of concupiscence
between god and certain creatures
first in his likeness, and then another,
an aggregation of soft mounds
and on the seventh day
he rested from the labour of
clumsy intercourse.
the shape of loss
maybe it is in your chest,
the way it contracts, tightly,
encroached by palpitations,
and the way you feel exposed
your insides displayed
on an inert slab, in public
left to embrace the emptiness
of cold stares, wagging tongues
or maybe it is in your hands,
how your cold palms try, but
fail, to grasp shadows of
something you will never be able
to reclaim, how your hugs, when you
try to cuddle, is met with a deafening
emptiness, crisp and incoherent all at once
sometimes, this is how loss works:
-
you walk into yourselves
on a certain windy evening
or maybe it is on the celestial
wingback of a social media room
then love becomes the unsaid codes,
the encrypted wishes lurking behind
your messages, then it is accepted,
allowed, left to crawl into existence
like a bundle of something from a pregnancy
-
you learn to fear commitments,
you are scared of many unknowns
a reality eating deep into your insides
but most importantly, you fear yourself
you cannot bear to show love—you do not
love, like everybody else, maybe you are not
normal, just a flaw in nature’s configuration-a
gradually become a faint whisper
in the periphery of his existence,
or maybe your absence haunts him too
but the fear won’t let you go back
you leave, a composite of nightmare,
lovelessness and abscondment
factory error
but you love him too much to hurt him
you would never forgive yourself
if you did
-
so, you become scarce from his warm embrace
gradually become a faint whisper
in the periphery of his existence,
or maybe your absence haunts him too
but the fear won’t let you go back
you leave, a composite of nightmare,
lovelessness and abscondment
maybe it is in the eyes
the way you soak up tears at night
stifling pain between recurring sniffs
love is the sorrow eating you up
so that you crave your conversations
promises of things you would do
to each other’s bodies
you miss him, you admit this
and wish you could crawl back
into his succulent breath
but loss is something you know too well…
Adefolami Ademola is a writer and social commentator
His poems have appeared in Sentinel Literary Quarterly, Prosopisia, New Orleans Review, Black Room, Poetry Potion, among others. His nonfiction pieces have been published in Akoma, The Nerve Africa, The Afro Vibe, Ynaija, Newshunter, Ebedi Review.
A 2016 PIN (Poets in Nigeria) Poets’ Residency Fellow, his poem, “Memories, regurgitated” made the Top Ten Shortlist in the 2016 edition of the Korea/Nigeria Cultural Poetry Fiesta.
His personal essay Dying in Installments was recently published in the print edition of the Selves Anthology of Creative Nonfiction.
He is Marketing Manager at Ouida Books.
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