“Spring is Hope” by Meenakshi Gogoi
Early in the morning, Rajesh silently entered his daughter’s room and was happy to see Namita sleeping peacefully, holding a pillow close to her heart. His wife Kavita saw him coming out of the room, wiping his moist eyes. Kavita asked, “Rajesh, are you alright?” and touched his shoulder. Rajesh softly said, “I am alright. These are tears of happiness seeing Namita in a deep sleep.” Kavita said, “Namita is slowly recovering. Nothing is more painful for a mother than losing her child. She needs time to heal. But I can see she is slowing coming out of her loss.” Rajesh said, “May God heal her wounds and give her inner peace. I want my jovial daughter back soon.” It had been a few months since Namita was staying with her parents after her son Anubhav’s death.
Namita met with her life’s great tragedy when eight-year-old Anubhav died in a fatal bus accident while coming from a school picnic. Several children were injured, and a few of them died on the spot. Anubhav was one of them. The sudden demise of Anubhav was traumatic for Namita like it would be for any mother. She lost her inner peace and began to talk less, distancing herself from people, even her husband, Manish. She was submerged in melancholy. Manish kept himself busy with office work and taking care of Namita. He and her parents were worried about Namita’s broken emotional state. Her parents would often come and stay with them. Her mother would spend much of her time during the day when Manish was not around. Life was racing, but Namita’s life was upside down. Her happiness was gone. A reversal of fortune, she was compelled to bear the loss of her only son. Namita would sit for hours in Anubhav’s room, arranging his books, copies, and clothes and keeping them in the cupboard. She would lay in Anubhav’s bed, crying her heart out at times and controlling her emotions afterward.
One afternoon, Namita dreamt of Anubhav. She saw Anubhav saying, “Maa, please, don’t cry for me. I want to see you happy. I am gone.” Namita was restless to see Anubhav and tried to pull him towards her. But he vanished in the air. She soon woke up shivering to find no one was beside her. Namita asked herself, “Was it a dream? My son left me. He wants me to be happy again.” She wanted to be a happy person like before but failed to feel tranquility after Anubhav’s death. She decided to stay home with her parents for some time to regain herself.
Namita phoned her mother one evening and said, “Maa, I want to stay with you and Papa. I want to be myself again and get hold of my life.” Her mother replied, “Yes, dear, you are most welcome. Your father and I are always with you.” Namita spoke to Manish about her decision to stay with her parents. Manish said, “Alright, Namita. I welcome your decision. If your parent’s house were not in the same city where we live, I would probably not have liked you to stay with them away from me. But I want your happiness. I will come and see you often. Promise me, you will overcome melancholy.” Namita’s eyes were moist, and she promised Manish, saying, “I will be back home again with my happy self and live with you.”
Manish would visit Namita at her parental home at weekends and sometimes after office hours in the evening. She was fighting a great battle inside and wanted to keep her son’s memories alive. But Namita did not want to hurt her dear ones and desired to retain her inner peace to bring happiness to her parents and Manish’s lives.
One morning, Namita was sitting in her home garden. She spotted some tiny new fresh green buds at the edges of a few flower plants, marking spring’s arrival. The blooming of colorful flowers and luscious green creepers at the sides of her garden was attracting her eyesight. The chirping of birds and fluttering of butterflies around warmed her heart. She thought about how spring’s greenery everywhere was the new hope for dead trees to breathe life again. The old dry leaves had fallen and been replaced by new light green leaves that welcomed the spring. She remembered planting a jasmine plant some months ago. Anubhav was waiting for the plant to bear flowers. He loved gardening and used to buy small flower plants from nurseries. She missed him dearly that day, spotting the blossoming spring flowers and beauty of nature to which Anubhav was so close. She was thoughtful about the mystery of nature and its serenity and aspired to live her life like a growing plant. She softly touched a red rose, smelled it, and smiled. Namita’s mother saw her from a distance and felt eased at heart. Days passed, and Namita was healing and opening up. Things were getting normal for her. She would clean the rotten, dry leaves from the garden and water the plants early in the morning and evening. She began to take care of the garden and house like before. Her parents were glad to see her coming to her previous self. She was talking and spending more time with her parents. Manish was ecstatic to find his lost Namita again.
One fine evening, Namita told her parents about her desire to live with Manish. Namita said, “Papa and Maa, I want to return home and stay with Manish. He is alone there. I want to care for Anubhav’s garden, plants, and other things. I am missing all of that.” Her parents were happy to hear that. Soon, after a few days, she left for her home.
One Sunday morning, Manish drove Namita home. She saw Manish had put some new flower pots in their garden. She went near the jasmine plant and was delighted to see tiny flower buds appearing all over the plant. Entering the house, she saw beautiful flowers adoring the crystal vases of their living room. Manish wanted to make her feel so very welcome back home. But Anubhav was still waiting to be found. She missed him dearly that day but did not lose her emotional control. She walked to Anubhav’s room and saw Manish had kept his room clean and arranged his things in order. He had put a giant photo frame of Anubhav on the bedside wall. Namita’s eyes were moist enough to see the photo frame, but those were tears of love for Anubhav. She entered her bedroom and fell more in love with Manish. He placed her favorite pink roses in a crystal vase on one corner table near the bed and a family photo frame. It was taken during Anubhav’s first birthday. She held the photo frame close to her heart, and Manish held her shoulders from behind. Within a few minutes, Namita was in his caring embrace. Manish said, “I want you to be always with me. Anubhav is in our beautiful memories. He is with us in our thoughts and hearts. I want you to accept the truth of life and let us move on.” With teary eyes, Namita replied, “You are right, Manish. I have realized the meaning of life today like never before. Anubhav is very much a part of our lives. I will not lose myself but love you more to keep loving myself and my dear Anubhav.” The warmth of the hug brings them closer to rejuvenating their lives with the new season of hope and love, the spring.
About the Author:
Meenakshi Gogoi holds a PhD from the Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU), Delhi, India. She writes short stories/fiction and loves to read non-fiction and biographies. Her works are published in Muse India, The Mocking Owl Roost Magazine, The Wild Word Magazine, Otherwise Engaged: The Literary and Arts Journal, the Literary Cocktail Magazine, Sunkissed Short Summer Romances: An Anthology by Red Polka Books, Shiuli Magazine, Double Speak Magazine. She is passionate about nature photography and gardening. She lives with her spouse and little daughter in Guwahati (Assam), India.
